Tag Archives: life

Becoming a True Human podcast – Episode 17: You are Greater than the Struggle – guest Nikhil Parekh MD

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Chris and Dave invite their old pal Nikhil Parekh MD, to join them to talk about their past work on Whole Health for Veterans Affairs (VA) and for ideas for the future of Whole Health work now that they are all no longer working at the VA. Nikhil is trained in Occupational & Environmental Medicine and is currently working with the University of Michigan. They share memories of teaching together and working to create the transformation of Whole Health at the VA. Whole Health was first started in 2011 through the national VA Office of Patient Centered Care & Cultural Transformation. Whole Health is the VA’s version of holistic, integrative care and self-care program for veterans and VA staff. Nikhil and Dave worked as Whole Health Education Champions and Chris worked on the contractor side, helping to develop and teach Whole Health classes to VA staff, alongside Education Champions like Nikhil and Dave.

Whole Health, the VA, and all federal employees, have been affected by changes in US government – a sudden shift with the new administration that led to Dave and Nikhil both leaving the VA. Dave describes how it felt like an instant creation of a hostile work environment with random, demanding, and unclear emails from DOGE (Department of Government “Efficiency”), and confusing communication coming down to leadership and from leadership to staff. Dave describes sitting in on review meetings where they had to comb through existing educational materials and remove suddenly censored words such as “women,” “female,” “trauma,” “diversity,” “Native American,” and “sociocultural,” to name just a few words.

They review Kübler-Ross’s stages of grief: depression, anger, denial, bargaining, and acceptance, and speak about their personal experiences of the grief of no longer being part of the transformational Whole Health program.

Chris asks Nikhil what “becoming a true human” means to him

“But then I realized that there was a life outside of the VA and it’s okay to pivot and realize you are greater than that. I think no matter what struggle anyone listens to this podcast is going through, you are greater than that struggle, especially you maintain your integrity, maintain your ethics, maintain your value system, because that is going to carry you through whatever personal and professional challenges you’re having in your life.“

“And so I say leaving the VA made me human. And it was actually, I will say this, like a weight coming off me the day I dropped off. I literally, people were checking in on me. was like, I’ve never been happier. I’m so happy to be shed of this. And, and I do miss, you know, I miss the people I worked with. miss the veterans. I miss it tremendously. But at the same time, it was destroying me instead of making me become human.”

Watch or listen to the full episode below:

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Moving (Becoming a True Human Podcast #12)

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It has been a while since I’ve posted here – a lot has been happening. Our family moved from Seattle to Madison, Wisconsin. We’ve talked about this before and almost moved, but this time we finally did it. There was a pull to be closer to aging parents. There was a push to get out of the VA and being a federal employee during a time that federal employees were being scapegoated, demonized, and “othered.”

As I wrote in the prologue of the Hero’s Journey class I used to teach to Veterans:

All journeys begin with a loss. Sometimes we do not recognize the loss, because we are so focused on the excitement of the new outer vistas we are entering. Other times, loss is the only thing we are aware of; we don’t see adventure or experience, we only see tragedy.


All journeys begin with a gain. Sometimes we do not recognize the gain, because we are so focused on the grief of what we are leaving behind. Other times, gain is the only thing we are aware of; we don’t see the loss, just the excitement of the new.


All journeys are ultimately made alone. Resign yourself to be alone, as all journeys require being alone.


All journeys are made with others. Embrace fellowship, because no journey is done completely alone.


Perhaps the entire secret of life is to continually strive to create enough space within ourselves, in our souls to accommodate as many of our life experiences —be they good or bad, joyful or tragic — as we can.

Joseph Campbell said that it is not so much that we are searching for meaning as that “what we’re seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances with our own innermost being and reality, so that we will actually feel the rapture of being alive,” (Joseph Campbell with Bill Moyers, The Power of Myth, 4-5).

At some point, maybe I will write more about the difficulties of this move, the death of our cat, Sofia, the week we were supposed to drive across the country, the cd player breaking in Idaho, the many delays and difficulties with moving into the new house, or our run in with a giant green man in Blue Earth, Minnesota.

For now, I’ll just introduce the next episode of the Becoming a True Human Podcast, Episode 12: Moving.

Episode 12: Moving:

After a long hiatus, Chris Smith and Dave Kopacz discuss the varied aspects of moving, from moving across the country, moving/transitioning jobs, being moved by stories, and the GI tract as a metaphor for life – moving too fast or moving too slowly can both be painful.

Chris shares a number of short readings from his work in progress, A Soft Way, a variation on the Tao Te Ching through the lens of chronic illness, specifically “moving disorders” such as Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Ulcerative Colitis, and Crohn’s Disease.

Dave muses about his recent cross-country move from Seattle to Madison, Wisconsin, applying the hero’s journey to everyday life, and changing jobs to allow greater movement and flexibility.

YouTube Video link

Spotify Audio link

Also, I didn’t post Episode 11: Freedom of Free Doom? Here it is for those who might want it:

With the 4th of July next week, Dave and Chris reflect on the relationship between Freedom and Free Doom. Is doom inherent in freedom, are they in some kind of relationship, can there be freedom without doom? They look at the inescapable reality of sickness and death in life and how these limitations can actually shape the kinds of human freedom that are available. We are “doomed” to die, and yet human freedom is possible within the span of birth to death. Limitation is also present in the choices that we make in life – one choice often precludes other options.

Dave draws on recent readings of Erich Fromm’s Escape from Freedom and Timothy Snyder’s On Freedom, which look at psychological and political perspectives on freedom and fascism. Chris ponders on the relationship between meditation and freedom. They discuss the relationship between individualistic and inter-relational freedom – agreeing that freedom of the individual is not possible without freedom of all as they draw on Dave’s Me/We version of the Circle of Health, Thich Nhat Hanh’s interbeing, and ubuntu as described by Archbishop Desmond Tutu. They end referencing Václav Havel’s definition of hope.

YouTube Video link

Spotify Audio link